WHY IS IT SO HARD TO FIND REAL MEN ANY MORE?

By Lubomir Dimitrov MSc,

Professional Astrologer, Australia

Part 1   Part 2   PART 3                  

Although the question raised in this article does not appear to be one of the most difficult spiritual topics to discuss, in fact it is! In order to explain it properly we have to have an understanding of some fundamental questions of creation. And indeed, I needed to split this article into three parts in order to answer it properly. Those of you who already read the previous two articles are by now familiar with those concepts; for those of you who haven’t, I recommend that you back-order the last two issues of Universal Mind. To summarize everything that we have said so far, it can be pointed out that the lack of real men can be attributed to the following six major factors:

1. With the advent of the new Age of Aquarius the traditional family model as we knew it for thousands of years is gradually collapsing.
2. In this new age, the roles of males and females are not strictly defined, as it used to be in the previous ages, but they intermingle their functions.
3. As a result, husbands do not love their wives “as their own flesh” and wives do not respect their husbands, as it was supposed to be according to the old scriptures.
4. Feminism, prosperous career women, draining men’s financial resources during and after divorce, single mothers raising boys and general lack of understanding about men’s psychological needs put masculinity under enormous pressure.
5. The new “Aquarian” society provides plenty of financial benefits to gay couples and economically penalizes men who want to be good husbands and fathers.
6. People have expectations to meet a real man or woman, without actually looking at themselves first (i.e. without conforming to the law of complementing of male and female energies).

Today we will elaborate on some of those factors that we haven’t discussed in the previous parts of this article. Let’s first look at the last one. We know that the spirit is genderless and normally incarnates at least twice during each of the Great Years – once as a male and once as a female (for more information on this topic read my article “The Age of Aquarius”,which was published in the May issue of “Universal Mind”). This fact does not mean that the spirit itself does not have its preferences. Quite frequently certain spirits exhibit strong inclinations towards one particular sex or another. The main idea of the spirit being incarnated in a human body is for the spirit to learn certain spiritual lessons, which cannot be learned otherwise in the spiritual world.

One may be inclined to think that the sex into which it incarnates does not matter, since the spirit itself does not posses a gender and so can easily fit into whatever body it wants. However, this is not the case. After the death, the physical body is bound to decomposition and decay, but the essence of it remains in the memory banks of the spirit. This is necessary, because in the time between the death and the new incarnation, when the spirit lives in the spiritual world, its main task is to ruminate over its past lives and the last one in particular. By re-living again what it had done right or wrong before, the spirit develops impulses that allow it to redeem its bad karma in its next life and it learns how not to repeat the same mistakes again.

Certain spiritual lessons can be learned in a male or a female body only, so the spirit needs to be incarnated in a particular sex if it wants to learn a particular lesson. However, if the spirit is strongly inclined to be reborn over and over again in its “favourite” sex, then it can have a problem adjusting to the body of the opposite sex, when the need for this arises. The tendency in the new Age of Aquarius is to intermingle the functions of males and females so eventually the differences between them are obliterated. For the clairvoyant observer it is obvious that a significant number of spirits that are now incarnated as women were previously incarnated at least three or four times in a sequence as men.

Let’s do the following exercise in order to understand better what that means. Leave the magazine in front of you for a minute and fold your arms without thinking. Note the position of your hands. Now try to fold your arms by reversing the position of your hand, for example if your left hand was on the top of the right one, fold them again but place your right hand on the top of the left one. Does it feel comfortable?

Something similar happens with the spirit, when it has been reincarnated several times into one particular gender and then it finds itself into the body of the opposite sex. It just does not feel comfortable enough. Similar to a new pair of shoes, it takes some time before one can adjust itself to the new conditions. In other words, although the spirit is quintessentially genderless it is not free from bias and it can comprise a bit more or less of the feminine or the masculine energy, depending on its preferences. The ideal, completed and perfectly balanced spirit comprises 50% male and 50% female energy. When such a spirit incarnates into a human body it imbues the energy of that body and forms a perfect organism that is free from bias and both masculine and feminine energies flow in harmony. If the spirit is embodied already with a certain surplus of one type of energy, a misbalance is created that sometimes may last a lifetime to fix.

Every human, however masculine or feminine may appear to us externally, in fact comprises a certain percentage of the opposite sex energy. For example Arnold Schwarzenegger consists of about 90% male energy and 10% female, Al Pachino has about 85% male energy, while some new age celebrities like Brad Pitt are just above 70%. The existence of female energy in males does not make them women; it just indicates the presence of their intuitive, receptive and imaginative part. Similarly the female sex-symbol of the 80s, 90s and even till present day – Madonna has a little bit over 60% female and about 40% male energy. This does not prevent her from arousing sexually millions of men around the world. One quick look at her website www.madonna.com shows that nearly all 54 concerts, comprising her 2004 world tour in May, June, July and August were sold out long before the event. So, the bottom line is that every individual comprises male and female energy at the same time, which is completely normal. In fact, it is actually beneficial for us in the new Age of Aquarius to develop these to a more or less equal level, thus having the benefits of both worlds.

The spiritual law of complementing the male and female energies states that two partners form a perfect couple, if their male and female energies complement each other to 100%. What does that means? That means that if for example the man has 80% male and 20% female energy, he will form a perfect union with a woman, which has 80% female and 20% male energy. In this case both their male and female parts will be complemented to 100%.

One of the greatest mysteries between sexes is the question: Why on earth do men get attracted by women and women get attracted by men? Well, the reason is exactly this: we are attracted by people that have in excess the type of energy that we are lacking ourselves. Men generally lack female energy and women lack male energy, so that is why they get desperate sometimes to find it in another person. You merge with another person in order to replenish your deficit of a particular type of energy (male or female), while the other person is doing exactly the same with you. In case you complement your male and female energies with those of your partner exactly to 100%, then you may think about “living happily ever after”. Until this happens, however, the search goes on.

This also explains many otherwise inexplicable behavioural patterns. For example, career women that hate men and don’t need them in their lives. When observing such women with a clairvoyant eye it is apparent that although physically they appear very sexy and feminine, in fact they have a great excess of male energy. Frequently, the last three or four incarnations of such spirits can be traced back in men’s bodies. Looking at them from this perspective their behaviour becomes logical and justified. What they learn, however, is how to develop greater femininity within themselves. Although they often say that they are happy and content living on their own, emotional blows, inexplicable loneliness, irrational moodiness and often general dissatisfaction in life will force them to examine themselves deeper.

By using the spiritual law of complementing the male and female energies, we can explain even such hard to tackle topics as homosexuality, for example. For years and years people cannot understand this phenomenon. This applies not only for the “clever” professors in psychology and psychiatry, but also for the gay men and women themselves. Traditionally, people thought that homosexuality is some form of disease. This is so far away from the truth as black is from white. You will never see somebody catching the “bug” and becoming a homosexual if this predisposition weren’t already within him or herself. I don’t think you will ever see somebody who will become gay, simply because he “caught the bug” from the guy sitting next to him in the public transport, for example.

The statement that homosexuality is not a disease is proven also by the fact that no one ever got “cured” from being gay. People can suppress more or less their inclinations, but the inclinations themselves never go away by means of medical, psychological or any other treatment. This brings us to the conclusion that homosexuality is inborn in the person by birth.

Although the above statement is very true, a lot of scientists make the mistake to attribute homosexuality to some “gay gene” that is passed from parents to children. This theory is crashed into pieces by careful research, for by studying the family trees of gay people we can see that it is clearly not supported. The chance that gay people have gay parents or grandparents is not greater than the general distribution of gay people within the society – namely about 5%. Gay people are born all the time in the families of perfectly “normal” parents and grandparents. At the same time, there are plenty of gay sperm donors, whose children’s sexual orientation is not affected in any way.

So while it is apparent that the individual is predisposed by birth to be homosexual or not, this is not because of the existence of some “gay gene”, but because of the specific organization of his emotional and psychological world. In other words, the real reasons for this phenomena are rooted not in the physical, but in the astral body of the individual. Here, astrology as a science studying the composition of the astral body can help us a great deal. In 99% of the cases, I can determine according to the astrological chart if the person in question has this predisposition or not. That means that homosexuality is inborn, but not genetically into the physical body. It is inborn astrally into the astral body of the individual.

And indeed, this is easily explained by the law of complementing the male and female energies too. The so-called “normal” man appears to the clairvoyant as an unbalanced person, comprising a great deal of male energy and just a little bit of female. Due to this imbalance in his aura, he is bound for an eternal search for a woman, who will make available to him the lacking femininity within himself. The “real” gay person appears also very unbalanced, but in the other way round – desperately lacking male energy. And then, there are the bisexual people, who appear more or less balanced and who fill in the grey area.

We will now classify men according to their sexual preferences in order to understand this concept better. Generally, all men can be divided into three major groups:

• Heterosexual men. These are the ones, which society in general describes as “normal”. Their masculine energy level is usually 2-3 times higher then their feminine energy level. They are strongly attracted to women and make the perfect marriage material. Quite the contrary to the popular belief that most men fit into this group, their percentage in the society is in fact only about 65%.
• Homosexual men. These are the ones, who are openly leading a gay life. They are not afraid to show on Mardi Gras parades, go out in gay pubs, clubs or other places and normally are open about their sexuality to their parents and friends. Their masculine energy level is usually 2-3 times lower then the feminine and for this reason they are attracted exclusively to other men only. Their percentage in society is usually low – about 5%, although some sources insist that they are up to 10%. Society in general makes the huge mistake to associate homosexuality with this small group of people only, without accounting for the massive third group.
• Bisexual men. These are the men, filling in the gray area, with a masculine level varying between 40 to 60%. Their percentage to the total population is not less then 30%. In other words we are talking about every third man here. Bear in mind also that “bisexual” is a very broad term, ranging from very occasional encounters to almost exclusive encounters with the same sex partners. The behavioural pattern that these men follow, varies and it is directly determined by the level of “openness” of the society in general. If the society is prohibitive about gay relationships, then bisexual men tend to get married and suppress the impulses that come from within them. A superficial glance on the surface of such societies normally shows that the total percentage of gay people is 5% or less, because due to the fear of harassment and maltreatment, gay encounters become extremely covert. If, however, the society is tolerant and open about it (as the western society increasingly becomes), then they may vacillate in their choices or may even declare themselves as “gay” while in fact, strictly speaking, they are not.

One typical example is the Russian society. I happened to live there for nearly 6 years exactly in the transitional period from communism to capitalism, i.e. from 1987 to 1993 (More information about my life pattern you can find in the About Me section of my web page). In the beginning of this period, the official statistics was that gay people do not exist in the communist society. And indeed, by merely observing the surface of the social order, one could not notice any traces of homosexuality. Yet, gay people existed as always, but in fear of being persecuted they operated underground, gathered in undisclosed private places, had their own secret language and symbolism in order to recognize each other, and behaved in pronouncedly masculine manner, when dealing with the general public.

The first thing what Boris Yeltzsin did when he came to power was to abolish the law, which criminalized gay relationships. Since then, I witnessed a gradual tendency in ever increasing number of gays and by the time of my departure, the famous gay newspaper “Blue Moscow” was in circulation, publishing thousands of phone numbers of guys who wanted to get in touch. A simple research on the internet today can prove that this tendency has now escalated to a level, where one can be very doubtful that Sydney and not Moscow is actually the gay capital of the world. The Russian reality today is that the people that classify themselves as gay or bisexual is at least 30-40%. This does not come as a surprise from a typical Aquarian country as Russia, in the dawn of the new age of Aquarius.

The huge shift in consciousness in identifying oneself as “gay” or “straight” comes up from a lack of understanding of male sexuality. Things are not black and white. In fact, the grey area is huge, but still not many people want to recognize that fact. The first ones who do not want to recognize this fact are the heterosexual men themselves. The reason being is that every man has had at least one homosexual encounter in his life. This is especially typical for boys in their teenage years, when they are hyper-sexual and are curious to see if their best mates are getting aroused and react sexually in the same way as they do. This is completely normal. Nearly every man passes through this stage. At the same time, however, nearly everybody is reluctant to admit it.

I have consulted hundreds of men and every time when this topic comes up, they shut up like a clamp. If I insist to bring the issue, though, more often than not they admit that they had had at least one sexual encounter with another man (and sometimes more than one), but they hate to think about themselves as being gay, because they do not feel this way. When I tell them that most other men are in their position, at first they feel surprised, but then they feel relieved. No man is an island. We are all creations of the same God, and it is certain that what happened to one of us, for sure happened to many others as well.

The key word here is communication, because through sharing our experiences we realize that we are not isolated, weird, anomalous sinners, but real people made from flesh and blood, with all our virtues and pitfalls. Besides, it is quite obvious that millions of gay people around the globe are not created “by mistake” and that there is a great plan behind it. I may write in some of my next articles about the exact reasons why homosexuality exists in the first place and what purpose it serves in the society, if there is reader’s interest about it. In this respect your feedback on this topic or about my articles in general, will be greatly appreciated. Please, drop me a line on info@lubomir.name .

In conclusion I would like to say that being a real man in today’s western society became a really tough call. Masculinity is under fire by a variety of factors. Most of these are listed in the beginning of this article. Naturally, there are many more which we did not even consider here, due to the constraint in space. Masculinity is not something that always was there and always will be there by default. It is something that has to be nurtured and cultivated. As one needs to put a lot of effort to produce bread and put it on the table, so similarly one needs to put a lot of effort to evolve into a real man. Not everybody will have the strength, the stamina and the willpower to develop it, especially when the society in general is opposing his efforts. Many men will opt to take the easy way out. In this regard, the role of women can be especially helpful. If women behave as real ladies, they can act as catalysts for men to grow as real men. Everything in the Universe is interconnected and this holds true especially strongly in the relationships between sexes. We should stop blaming, and start changing ourselves. The external reality is a mere projection of the internal reality. When a woman changes herself and becomes a real lady, the real men will start appearing in her life for sure!

Lubomir Dimitrov

Perth, Western Australia

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